ONLY IN THE FROZEN TUNDRA...

The local Green Bay television station had a feature warning of the dangers of going barechested at the Packers' game. The weather forecast for Sunday's game is a high of 6 degrees, snow flurries, and a wind chill of minus ten degrees. To be sure, there will be a cadre of beer-soaked, soft-bellied men, shirtless and shouting "woo hoo." This is mandatory, like Uncle Sam on the Fourth of July, or Santa Claus at Christmas. The Red Cross will be at the ready with nipple defrosters for Cheesehead casualties.

WE Wisconsinites always like to defeat a New York team, and there have been so few chances lately.

Book Review

Author: Gantos, Jack.

Title: Love curse of the Rumbaughs

In ten words or less: Obsessive mother love meets taxidermy.

Review:

Is Ivy doomed to follow in the footsteps of the elderly twin pharmacists who live across the street? Is heredity or environment more powerful? As she grew up, she realized that Abner and Adolph were a little strange, but they were kind to her and her mother. It came as a shock to her, when on her 16th birthday, her mother revealed to her that one of the men (she did not know which one) was her father. And while Ivy loved her mother greatly, was she bound to follow in the footsteps of the twins, who kept their mother after her death, preserved by taxidermy? With its gothic overtones and very dark humor, this young adult novel is not for everyone.

Why bother? If Stephen King and V.C. Andrews met on the set of "Psycho," this might have been the result. It's funny, and a little wistful, but totally original.

BOOK REVIEW

Savage, Sam. Firmin: adventures of a metropolitan lowlife.

In ten words or less: Rat learns to read and contemplates the meaning of life.

Born in a run-down bookstore in Boston’s Scollay Square, Firmin the rat discovers a taste for literature. While competing with his many siblings for food, Firmin discovers that great books can be quite tasty. It’s while he’s munching on Shakespeare and Dickinson that his hidden talent for reading emerges.
After a life threatening encounter with the bookseller, Firmin is adopted by an eccentric science fiction author. Definitely not a book for children, Firmin’s black humor and literary commentary will appeal to readers who enjoy the, ahem, weird.

Why bother? A unique perspective on life and literature from a world weary rodent.

QUOTE OF THE DAY

"I've come to the reluctant but inescapable conclusion that roughly 50% of the adults in this country are simply too ignorant and functionally incompetent to be living in a free society. You might think I'm off base, but every day around half the people in this country go out of their way to prove me right."--Neal Boortz, "Somebody's Gotta Say It."

I am not a Neal Boortz fan, but the people in the library are a good example of this.

BOOK REVIEW

Title: Clemente

Author: David Maraniss

In ten words or less: Terrific biography of the Pittsburgh Pirate great.

Review: Roberto Clemente was the first great Latin American baseball star. The right fielder with the amazing arm spent 18 seasons with the Pittsburgh Pirates, and died in 1972 in a tragic plane crash, while delivering relief supplies to Nicaraguan earthquake victims. “Clemente never held anything back from the people and gave them more than they had any right to expect from him,” said Joe Brown, Pirates general manager.

Author David Maraniss is a Washington Post staff writer who has written other books, including “First in his class: a biography of Bill Clinton,” (1995) and the Pulitzer Prize winning “When pride still mattered: a life of Vince Lombardi” (1999).

Why bother? Much more than a sports biography—insightful profile of a complex man and the insidious racism of major league baseball.

Insect Fear Film Festival

It's time once again for my favorite film festival. It's about seven hours from the northwoods to Champaign-Urbana, so I hope the weather holds. The theme this year is Japanese insect movies--a tribute to Mothra. For more information, go to http://www.life.uiuc.edu/entomology/egsa/ifff.html

QUOTE OF THE DAY

"I had no shoes, and I felt sorry for myself until I met a man with no feet. I took his shoes. Now I feel better." --George Carlin

QUOTE OF THE DAY

"And yet you come bringing me Fink-Nottles. Is this the time for Fink, or any other kind of Nottle?"--P.G. Wodehouse, "Right Ho, Jeeves."

BOOK REVIEW

Title: Ladies’ Man

Author: Suzanne Brockmann

In ten words or less: Handsome young cop falls for older single mother in danger.

Review: Ellen, an English professor at Yale, has a summer fling in New York City with a gorgeous, younger cop named Sam. But will Sam be able to protect her from a deranged stalker? Sam meets Ellen when he is mistaken for a famous author who has agreed to write her uncle’s biography. Fresh from a divorce, Ellen is escaping her suburban Connecticut home for a summer in the city, where she hopes to switch careers and become an actress. After a quick sexual encounter in a limousine, Sam is in love, but Ellen wants just a fling. Who prevails?

Why bother? Romance and danger combine for a satisfying read.

BOOK REVIEW

Title: Clearing Customs

Author: Martha Egan

In ten words or less: Gift shop owner is targeted by customs officials.

Review: Folk art dealer Beverly Parmentier is being pursued by crooked agents from the U.S. Customs Service. Beverly is an honest businesswoman who can't figure out why her store is being targeted or why she is being followed, even on a rafting trip on the Yampa River. Could it be that she spoke out on behalf of a fellow importer unjustly accused of smuggling? Or is it her Peace Corps background and her ex-hippie lifestyle?

Martha Egan wrote this novel in 1988 in response to the U.S. customs Service war on small import businesses. Egan was raised in DePere, WI and is a graduate of St. Joseph's Acacemy in Green Bay.

Why bother? Great combination of humor and mystery with a dash of over zealous government agents thrown in for good measure.

BOOK REVIEW

Title: Holmes on the Range

Author: Steve Hockensmith

In ten words or less: Two cowboys solve a murder a la Sherlock Holmes.

Review: Gustave "Old Red" Amlingmeyer is a Montana cowboy who dreams of being the Sherlock Holmes of the American frontier. With winter fast approaching and no income to rely on, Old Red and his younger brother Otto "Big Red" hire on as hands at the Bar-VR Ranch. After a stampede, the body of the ranch manager is found, an apparent murder. Soon another man is discovered to have committed suicide--or is it more foul play?
The sights and sounds of the 1890s American west come alive in this mystery-meets-western. This is a first novel from Hockensmith, who is a contributor to Alfred Hitchcock's Mystery Magazine and Ellery Queen's Mystery Magazine.

Why bother? The strange blend of mystery and western works well, because of the likeable brothers.

LOBSTER BOIL WITH ELVIS

That was the sign outside a resort in the Wisconsin Dells this past weekend. Was the lobster named Elvis? Was Elvis boiling lobsters from beyond? So much to ponder.

BOOK REVIEW

Title: Cinderella Pact: a Novel

Author: Sarah Strohmeyer

In ten words or less: Overweight friends support each other while trying to lose weight.

Review: Nola Devlin is an editor at Sass! magazine but feels her ideas are not seriously considered because she is overweight. When she turns in sample columns under he own name, she is sure they get tossed straight in the trash. But when she invents sexy Belinda Apple, and submits her identical columns with a picture of the oh-so-trendy Belinda attached, her editor at Sass! is salivating at the thought of snagging Belinda as a contributor.
While the mysterious Belinda is penning columns on weight loss, style, and sex, Nola is making a pact with her two best friends to get in shape over the next six months. Nola has no social life, so what does she have to lose? And her younger sister is sure that Nola is envious of her upcoming wedding, and asks "Belinda" to be her maid of honor.
And then...a handsome computer geek named "Chip" shows some interest in Nola. Is he for real? Lightweight fluff, but readable and fun.

Why bother? Perfect paperback to bring with you on a weekend getaway.

PUGS ON HALLOWEEN

Ruby is not every happy about dressing up for Halloween.

BOOK REVIEW

Title: Out of the Frying Pan, into the Choir: a Ruby, the Rabbi's wife mystery

Author: Sharon Kahn

In ten words or less: The murder of a choir member has Ruby investigating.

Review: Temple Rita's choir has a trip to Lake Louise and Banff scheduled but Temple busybody Essie Sue thinks that funds have fallen short. She hires paty planner/grief counselor Bitsy to co-ordinate latke sales in support of the trip.
The choir's lead soprano Serena Salit collapses and dies during the next concert. But the train trip must go on, and despite a warning from her policeman boyfriend, Ruby--rabbi's widow and amateur sleuth--boards the train.
There are plenty of suspects, from Serena's ex-husband to a womanizing tenor. And when Ruby spots a body as she is taking photos from the back of the train, she begins to fear for her safety.
This is a great "kosher cozy"--plenty of humor and Ruby is a thoroughtly likeable heroine.

Why bother? A lighthearted cozy guaranteed to bring a smile. The authors website is http://www.sharonkahn.com

BOOK REVIEW

Title: Cross Bones: A Temperance Brennan mystery

Author: Kathy Reichs

In ten words or less: A skeleton leads Tempe to Israel, seeking an ancient tomb.

Review: After an Orthodox Jew is murdered, a mourner gives Tempe a photograph of a skeleton, and hints it is a clue to the crime. An anthropologist friend tells Tempe the photo was taken in Israel, and the skeleton may be linked to an ancient tomb, one that arguably belongs to the family of Jesus. And are the bones the remains of James, the brother of Jesus?
Reichs combines the elements of a good mystery with history and archeology. "The Da Vinci Code" fans should check out this book.

Why bother? Tempe Brennan fans will not be disappointed, but it's not necessary to read the earlier books in the series to enjoy this one.

QUOTE OF THE DAY

"Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside a dog, it's too dark to read."
--Groucho Marx

BOOK REVIEW

Title: Nerds Like it Hot

Author: Vicki Lewis Thompson

In ten words or less: Witness to a murder hides on a nerds only cruise.

Review: Hollywood makeup artist Gilliam McCormick witnesses a suspect leaving a murder scene. The victim is actor Theo Patterson, and the murderer is Neil Rucker, who lost the starring role that Theo won. To complicate matters, Neil is the stopson of a notorious mobster.

In a panic, Gilliam flees to the home of octogenarian actress Cora, who hires two hot young bodyguards and helps Gilliam to transform herself into a Marilyn Monroe look-alike. They book passage on an "all nerds" cruise.

Most of the cruise is spent trying to figure out if Gilliam is being tailed by a mafia hitman. Included are some humorous situations and hot sex.

Why bother? For fans of romance who like it light, funny, and steamy.

BOOK REVIEW

Title: The Highly Effective Detective

Author: Richard Yancey

In ten words or less: Security guard turned detective investigates the killing of goslings.

Review: Teddy Ruzak always wanted to be a detective, but after he washed out of the police academy, he took a job as a security guard on the night shift. Not endowed with a lot of ambition or drive, there he stayed until his mother died.
He used the money from the sale of her house to bankroll his detective agency. He didn't know he needed a license when he accepted his first case--the hit-and-run murder of a gaggle of goslings. He's in over his head from the beginning.
Ruzak is a likable if somewhat pathetic character--his heart is in the right place but he realizes he doesn't want to do any more work than he has to.

Why bother? A detective for the rest of us--not handsome, fearless, or brilliant--but an average guy in over his head. A refreshing change from the detective-as-superhero.

RESPONDING TO 'THE HATERS'

"You spill love and calm and reassurance....For those of us who have not mastered this advanced technique, a Revolution in Favor of Kindness and Libraries seems like a nice idea."
--Molly Ivins, August 28, 2006